Want to Get Better at Achieving Your Goals? Heal Your Relationship Pain! ~ Full Moon in Libra

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              This Friday, April 19th, we welcome a New Full Moon in our lives. This time, the Full Moon arrives in the sign of Libra.
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                The Full Moon is such a special time of the year! This is the part of the moon cycle when the moon is its fullest, lighting up the night sky and illuminating our way in the darkness of night. It is a potent time for deep energetic work and creating movement and change internally and with feminine energies.


                This Full Moon arrives in the sign of Libra. Libra is of course symbolized by the Scales. This sign is all about relationships, harmony, balance and two-way communication.  Traditionally, people born under the sign of Libra tend to be the people least likely in the zodiac to be content outside of relationships. Though it is certainly true that you are already complete as an individual, the energy that comes with the sign of Libra tends to push those born under its sign to seek out companionship and completion in another person.  This could also occur when a moon phase enters the sign of Libra.
               

            I’m completely convinced that one of the main reasons we are here on this planet is for love and connection. Look at how we come into this world and the state we are in for quite some time. We are born completely helpless and remain still more helpless than not for several years. This helplessness causes us to completely depend on others and to form attachments and relationships for survival. We are so helpless, in fact, that no human can survive its infancy without the help of others, human or otherwise. Psychologists and psychiatrists agree that children constantly seek out love and affection when very, very young, and psychologists also agree that this need for love and affection and connection is SOO important, that your success or failure at getting the love you seek will affect your personality, your behavior, your fears and your drives for years to come, well into old age if you allow it to do so.
               

                In short, you are coded to seek out relationships with others. You need and deserve to be loved. You need to connect with others, you need to receive and give affection, and you need to be touched. Now this moon cycle, we’re not going to talk so much about manifesting love, affection and relationships, as I personally associate that with a different part of the moon cycle, the New Moon.! So stay tuned as we will definitely explore that in it’ time! But this month, we’re exploring the Full Moon in Libra, which, to me, is more about healing and releasing the pain and toxicity that we often absorb in our relationships.

   

                Relationships are important, but at the same time, it is so important that those relationships be healthy. Unhealthy relationships could cause a LOT of damage. And this is not just sitting in the dark, crying and eating cookie dough, ok! We’re not just talking about depression or even temporary despair. Pain and emotional damage that we accumulate in relationships can fester and rot within us, causing all sorts of growth damage that can manifest as fear, rage, resentment, hopelessness and self-hatred. These are not just poisonous to our social lives, but can actually prove fatal to your self-development, your growth potential, your self-esteem and your ability to attain your goals and achieve your dreams.


                The Full Moon, with its potent power to illuminate the darkness in our lives physically AND spiritually – as without, so within! – is a great time to tap into powerful energies to heal, address and release powerful emotions and forces.


                This Full Moon, let’s talk about incorporating three vital and life-renewing practices into your life: self-correction, forgiveness and gratitude.



              1.Self-Correction.  This Full Moon, you may certainly have found yourself in a relationship that is not to your loving or even your liking. You may feel that you have been putting up with and giving in to hurtful words, disloyalty, lying, dishonesty or worse. But now, I ask you: Who is the most powerful person in your world? It’s YOU.  YOU are the magician of your world, the star of your life stage. This Full Moon, we need to acknowledge our OWN roles that we play in the happiness – and misery  - in our relationships. When a relationship does not please you – when there is toxicity and negativity and pain  - we need to remind ourselves that we are one half of every relationship we have with another person. The other person has power in the relationship, yes. But YOU have a great deal of power in the relationship. You must acknowledge your own role in the fighting and the misery. When you fight and quarrel with your lover or any other person, you must acknowledge the fact that a fight means two people are contributing angry and violent energy and hurling it towards each other. It is not a one-sided thing. In order for you to fight with someone, it requires your contribution of combative energy as well. Alternatively, when your lover or any other person deals out disrespect and abuse, there must be a receiver of that abuse. If you are being the victim of abuse, you must acknowledge your part in playing the role of the victim. Abuse cannot happen if there is no victim for it to happen to. If you are in a painful relationship, the first step is to step back and really see YOUR role in the painful relationship. Forget the other person for right now. What have you been doing with YOUR power? Have you been raging at your partner, even if it’s in “defense”?  Or is what you’ve been doing with your power is give it away? Own up to what you have been doing in your relationships and acknowledge your own part in your current results.


            2.Forgiveness.  One important aspect of life happiness in general and relationship happiness in particular is Forgiveness. It is vital to practice forgiveness. It is one of the most difficult practices to do, but it is also one that will improve your life the most drastically. Toxic relationships and even pain in healthy relationships can get lodged within us and fester. Resentment, anger, betrayal, jealousy, fear and shame can become lodged deep within us. Over time, if not willfully released, the energy will intensify over time, twisting your thoughts, your emotions, your heart energy, your beliefs and eventually, by default, your actions and ability to manifest your desires. In short, the trauma of your past and current relationships directly affects your current and any future relationships. This is the reason why, as just one common and small example, if you’ve felt betrayed by a past lover you may have a very hard time trusting any other lover that comes after, no matter how different they are, if you have not properly dealt with the trauma from the previous betrayal.  Emotional pain, when ignored, does NOT go away!  It remains locked up in your body and will petrify over time, often resurfacing at emotionally vulnerable times when the old wound is agitated.  When the old wound is agitated, it will often spill out, once again hurting your current relationship. This cycle will continue until you face and deal with the  trauma.  The first step to stopping this hellish cycle and healing your future is Forgiveness.  Forgiveness is the act of releasing ALL resentment, all anger, all ill will, all evil intent and all counting wrongs towards another. It is not the same thing as forgetting or approving of malicious behavior. It is the release and cutting of all toxic energetic cords. Most people think of Forgiveness as being beneficial to the forgive, or the person being forgiven, which is why this idea fills so many with such horror. “You want me to FORGIVE that person?!” people say. “Do you know what they DID to me?!”  However, Forgivenesss is more about benefiting and healing YOU, as the forgiver. When you hold a grudge against someone, you are energetically tying yourself to that person. You are focusing on them, and giving away your God-given power to them.  So many of our spiritual texts state time and time again, “Where attention goes, energy flows.”  And anger and hatred and vitriol are FIRE! They are intense energies! You are giving them MORE power. But when you forgive, you cut all energetic ties. You don’t feed them attention, because they cease to matter any more than anyone else. You don’t feed them attention, and you therefore don’t feed them energy. Furthermore, resentment takes a lot of energy in your body. It’s like a furnace that can burn and burn within you. When you release this, and stop, you stop the burning! This is immensely healthy not just to your emotions, but your psyche and your body. Forgiveness is not easy. It can feel practically impossible, and may open the floodgates of your emotions. But you MUST do it. Oh, and this includes YOURSELF. Please don’t forget to forgive yourself. Very important. Forgive, release, fill the void that it leaves with love, and move forward on a clean slate.


​                 3.Gratitude. And finally, after all this heavy energetic work of self-correction and forgiveness, it’s time to have a little fun! It is so important to practice Gratitude. Even if things are not how you exactly want them to be, it is so important to recognize that you have SOO much to be grateful for right NOW. Practicing gratitude is something that you could greatly benefit from doing daily, though you should do it at LEAST once a month. And the Full Moon is a great time to do so! This Full Moon, after you’ve admitted your own role in your circumstances (including your unwanted circumstances), and released all ill energy in your relationships, the next step is to fill the void that has been created with Gratitude! Sit down and make a list of at least 10 things that you are absolutely, unabashedly grateful for. Now is not the time to be modest! It’s time to be honest! If you are in a healthy relationship, or there are things you admire about your lover or the other person, list them! What about your relationship(s) is amazing? Do you have incredible sex? Are they kind and generous? List out all the things your lover or the other person did for you that was wonderful. Remember THOSE things. If there is NOTHING about your current relationship that you can think of to be grateful for…nothing at ALL…absolutely nothing…Well, that’s food for thought, isn’t it? You are here for joy, happiness, peace, victory and LOVE, and you are here to spread those very things to others. You deserve and need better. This very well could be a wakeup call. But even so…! You STILL have countless things to be grateful for! List things about YOU, your life, your children, your income, the food in your fridge, the clean water in your sink, your health, your heart, your health, and your love that you have to give and WILL be giving to someone deserving of it. Be grateful for what you have, and the Universe will bless you with so much more.

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