ILLUMINATING THE DARKEST PAIN & SHAME OF YOUR LIFE FOR HEALING ~ Full Moon in Scorpio

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  Hi! Kesha here of New World Tarot, and thank you for joining me today for another blog!

                I hope you are doing well and feeling happy and peaceful and free and thus far enjoying your spring…OR your autumn, if you happen to live in the Southern Hempishere! Thanks to the power of the Internet, that’s certainly possible!
               

         This Saturday, May 18th, we welcome a new Full Moon in our lives, this time in the sign of Scorpio. The Full Moon is of course the most dramatic and illuminating part of the moon cycle, when the moon is her fullest and round and spectacular to behold.  To me, the moon in this period is a symbol of a goddess, her fullness promising to deliver what you worked to manifest since the New Moon, and to take in and dissipate what you give her now. This strikes me as just a magical and energetically potent time to do your most important and most difficult energetic work.


               During the Full Moon, the moon is casting so much silver light that if you are in a dark place with no other lights around, you can actually still see around you really well, provided the clouds aren’t covering her. I mean, if you’ve ever stood in a completely dark room at night and had access to huge windows that allowed an unobstructed Full Moon into the room...wow! 

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         The Full Moon can be incredibly illuminating – almost sunlight within the darkness! It certainly can be so bright you not only can see everything in the room, but can also find it impossible to sleep at night! It’s amazing. In fact, I see the Full Moon in particular as a sort of feminine sun. The duality is so striking – on one hand the Full Moon is extremely illuminating and almost masculine in its aggression, and on the other it is so gentle and feminine and mysterious. Of course I love the Tarot, and I can’t help but think of the card that is ruled by the moon, The High Priestess. I definitely see the emblem of the High Priestess in all the moon phases, but definitely the Full Moon especially, when the moon comes into her fullest power.  And we can even see it in the crown of the High Priestess card in the traditional Rider-Waite-Smith deck: a center full moon flanked by a waxing moon on one side and a waning moon on the other side. So beautiful.



        So, as we know, each Full Moon emerges in a different sign, thus flavoring its power differently each month. This Full Moon arrives in the sign of Scorpio. Oh boy, the sign of the Scorpion! You may know some Scorpios, OR you may be a Scorpio yourself! People who are Sun-sign Scorpios are born roughly between October 22nd and November 22nd.  Scorpio is a Water sign, meaning it is ruled by the element of Water. Now, there are 3 Water signs in the Western zodiac: Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces.  Scorpio has a quadruplicity of Fixed (there are three quadruplicities in each element: Cardinal, Fixed and Mutable). Scorpio is Fixed Water, which means in short it is an aggressive, deeply rooted, turbulent and stubborn form of Water.  Scorpio is intense! Scorpio is a choppy ocean full of sultry mermaids, spectacular sea monsters and viscious ship-sinking whirlpools. Scorpio is a magnificent, powerful sign full of mystery, darkness, sexuality, fantasies, nightmares, and secrets. Scorpio is an ocean of deep, dark secrets, the metaphoric ocean harboring an ocean floor full of long-forgotten shipwrecks.


        We ALL have a little bit of Scorpio in us. Some more than others. But one thing is certain: It’s all but impossible for us to journey through this experience called Life without accumulating energetic and emotional scars and trauma. Humans do horrible things to each other. Humans say horrible things to each other. Violence, abuse, hatred – whether directed at others or at yourself – are impossible to avoid completely in this world. It’s important to realize that all violence, all attacks, all abuse, comes out of fear. Many people victimize others because they are afraid to be victims themselves, and they see no other way to get control of their lives: they become a victim or a victimizer and there are no other options.  Many people victimize others because they want vengeance for a wrong that was done to them, and others have taken on the image of the wrongdoer in that person’s mind. 




          No matter the source of the scarring – be it violence, abuse, neglect, hatred – we have all been victims of dark behavior and perpetrators of dark behavior.  It is likely – especially when you were younger – that you simply tamped down your pain and shame when it occurred to you, and did your best to move on. If someone deeply hurt you, you may have just pushed it down and kept moving. If you hurt someone else, did you ask the victim to forgive you? Maybe you did, or maybe you didn’t. Even if you did, did you then forgive YOURSELF? When we’ve been violated or when we feel guilt for violating others, the energetic scars and ramifications, if not dealt with properly, could become locked up in our bodies and our subconscious. Over time, this energy can become increasingly toxic, manifesting in personality defects such as chronic distrust, extreme fear, anxiety disorders, depression, anger and violence problems and even physical maladies and disease. The word disease, after all, is a conjuction of “dis-ease,” meaning a body that is not at ease.



        This Full Moon in Scorpio, I want to ask you, “What dark secrets are YOU hiding? What darkness is deep inside you that you are not illuminating and not dealing with?” This could be something that was done to you, or something you’ve done to others. Perhaps it is both. It is not uncommon, especially in regards to abuse, anger and violence, for painful behavior to cycle, especially if the pain occurred when we were very young.  This month, any pain and trauma can be addressed. However, I am especially calling out pain, shame and trauma of a violent and sexual nature, such as rape, molestation and domestic abuse. I’m coming right out and naming these in particular because they are the ones that our society is most uncomfortable around and most fearful of, and as a result of this, they are more likely to be pushed down to the deep, dark abysss of your soul and psyche to rot and fester, and are less likely to be properly dealt with.



       If our psyche is an ocean, I like to think of a shipwreck lying at the bottom as representative of painful events that we’ve been a part of.  A heinous event occurs, a once-beautiful and buoyant ship sinks to the bottom of our soul…and just stays there. We think because it’s in our past and because we cannot see it anymore it’s fine, it’s not there. But it IS there. Worse, it’s poisoning our internal ecosystem around it with its peeling paint, leaking chemicals, etc. These shipwrecks often become haunted by the metaphoric ghosts of the past. Especially is this pain is a source of great shame, you cannot be the powerful person you are here to be and still carry this within you. You MUST illuminate it, face it, haul it up and heal. And the way to heal is to bring up the ship and remove it.  It’s a big job, and it may not be easy, and in fact it may be the hardest thing you ever do. You may need help in the long term. But fortunately , the Full Moon is a great energetic force for hard jobs, and can help you.



     This Full Moon in Scorpio, I would like you to devote the lunar energies to truly being honest with yourself.  What scars do you carry within you? What is haunting you?  What is or was you role in the pain? Were you the victim? Were you the perpetrator? Both? Was something done to you, but do you hate yourself because you feel as though you’ve caused it?
It is so important, in order to grow into your God-given power, that you release and heal, pain, shame and trauma. The darker it is, the more important it is for you to heal it.


​#1. Get Help. I cannot emphasize the importance of needing help sometimes. Being independent is wonderful. It’s great and should be something we aspire to. But there are some jobs so big, that we cannot handle them 110% alone. And you need to know that that is OK. That doesn’t make you weak. How do you know if you need help with healing pain or trauma? One hint is if you’ve tried to deal with it before on your own and were unsuccessful. If you’ve tried to “raise that ship” on your own, but have found yourself struggling with the same issues over and over, you likely need some assistance. Wester professional assistance is very valuable and takes many forms, from informal meetups and support groups to therapy and counseling. If you are someone who is more spiritually minded and look down on Western traditional methods, please be openminded! There is value in different methods, and don’t ever feel as though you must choose! There is no reason to choose. One thing that Tarot has taught me is that there is value and light in all paths. A blended life is a rich life. Life on Earth can be tough and scary and leave scars, and it’s ok to need help from time to time. Never feel as though you are weak or a failure of some sort if you need to get help. No one has done anything of greatness without help, and living is no exception.


#2. Practice Forgiveness. This is so EXTREMELY important. When you hold on to resentment and pain in your body, what you are doing is energetically tying yourself to the object of your ire and resentment. You are making your happiness, your freedom and your joy conditional, instead of what it is meant to be, which is constant, ever-present and infectious. You are essentially giving away your power, and worse, giving it to the person who has wronged you. The only way to free yourself from this energetic servitude is to forgive. Now this does NOT mean you condone their behaviour. What they may have done to you could damn well be deplorable and reprehensible. But for your own personal healing and release, you must forgive them. And let’s not forget ourselves in this category! It’s soo important to forgive yourself. This is especially true if you were the perpetrator in harming others, and you may even need to forgive yourself if you were in fact the victim. The Full Moon is a wonderful time to begin the process of releasing these heavy, difficult energies. Furthermore, you may need to forgive over and over and over and over again for a while, depending on how much damage has been done to you. That’ ok. Each time you do it, it becomes easier. Don’t be afraid of your emotions. Make sure you are safe, and either alone or within reach of supportive company if this is what’s needed. This is a part of healing, the illumination and the shedding of light upon the darkness. I have a nice Fire and Water Full Moon forgiveness ritual here:
http://www.newworldtarot.org/spreads-n-spells.html


​#3. Practice Self-Correction. Once you have forgiven, this is wonderful! Please pat yourself on the back and praise yourself! This is hard work! But now, the good work that you are doing continues as you live your daily life. Especially if you have been harboring emotions such as resentment or self-hatred for quite some time, you now need to start learning how to NOT do that.  This may be incredibly difficult at first. This may have been your default way of being. But you must now practice self-observation – observing your actions, your thoughts and your feelings, and stopping what is harmful and what will return you to your emotional slavery, and instead choosing the empowering choices of love, self-love, patience and compassion. Again, you may need help with this. It’s ok; ask for it and accept it.

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